The Inventory

America's Finest News Source.

Sunday Magazine

2/8/19

5:04 PM

Onion Magazine2/8/19

Onion Magazine2/8/19

We Predict Who Will Watch The Grammys This Sunday

1/25/19

9:55 AM

Onion Magazine1/25/19

Onion Magazine1/25/19

We Sat Down With 10 Doctors And Asked, Is It Cancer? Oh God, It’s Cancer, Isn’t It?

1/18/19

9:29 AM

Onion Magazine1/18/19

Onion Magazine1/18/19

Ready For Her Close-Up: This Actress Is Ready For Her Close-Up

12/28/18

12:00 PM

Onion Magazine12/28/18

Onion Magazine12/28/18

Remembering Michael Caine: Not Dead Yet, But It’s Still Nice To Be Thought About From Time To Time

12/7/18

10:38 AM

Onion Magazine12/7/18

Onion Magazine12/7/18

The Swimsuit Issue

11/30/18

11:20 AM

Onion Magazine11/30/18

Onion Magazine11/30/18

In High School They Called Him ‘Hog Fucker.’ Now He Fucks Hogs For The Stars.

11/16/18

10:48 AM

Onion Magazine11/16/18

Onion Magazine11/16/18

Let’s Fuck Already! Our Horniest Issue Yet

11/9/18

11:17 AM

Onion Magazine11/9/18

Onion Magazine11/9/18

He Was The Darling Of The Festival Circuit. He Dominated Awards Season. He Had One Of The Biggest Production Companies In The World. Why One Man Decided To Walk Away From It All

11/2/18

11:38 AM

Onion Magazine11/2/18

Onion Magazine11/2/18

The Nation’s Most Picturesque Landscapers

10/26/18

10:59 AM

Onion Magazine10/26/18

Onion Magazine10/26/18

The School Bus: Is It Coming For Our Kids?

10/19/18

2:41 PM

Onion Magazine10/19/18

Onion Magazine10/19/18

These Rival Gang Members Came Together To Help Build A Community Playground To Fight Over

10/12/18

1:31 PM

Onion Magazine10/12/18

Onion Magazine10/12/18

This Bitter Couple Tells Us The Secret To A 3-Year, 5-Month, And 2-Week Marriage

10/5/18

11:59 AM

Onion Magazine10/5/18

Onion Magazine10/5/18

This Is Angela, She’ll Be Training With Us For This Issue

9/28/18

12:49 PM

Onion Magazine9/28/18

Onion Magazine9/28/18

8 Years After The Gulf Coast Oil Spill And These Birds Still Look Like Shit

9/21/18

12:17 PM

Onion Magazine9/21/18

Onion Magazine9/21/18

The Investigation Stalled, The Case Went Cold, We Had To Print Something Anyway

9/14/18

12:07 PM

Onion Magazine9/14/18

Onion Magazine9/14/18

Top 5 Most Potent Celery Strains

7/20/18

11:46 AM

Onion Magazine7/20/18

Onion Magazine7/20/18

Drowning Is The Number Two Cause Of Death For Young Children. Here’s How To Make It Number One.

4/26/18

12:51 PM

Onion Magazine4/26/18

Onion Magazine4/26/18

The 10 Characters Most Likely To Die In ‘Avengers: Infinity War,’ According To Family Medical History

4/13/18

9:30 AM

Onion Magazine4/13/18

Onion Magazine4/13/18

This Child Would Have Turned 6 Today If His Mother Hadn't Given Birth To Him In October

3/26/18

4:04 PM

Onion Magazine3/26/18

Onion Magazine3/26/18

We Interview Some Guy Who Hated ‘March For Our Lives’ Out Of A Desperate Terror Over Being Accused Of Bias

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