United Airlines Offering Immigrants Special Flights That Circle U.S. Awaiting Gaps In Travel Ban

CHICAGO—In response to the executive order restricting entry to the United States from six majority-Muslim nations, United Airlines announced Friday that the carrier will offer immigrants and refugees special flights that continuously circle the country until gaps in the travel ban allow them to land. “We’re excited…

Advertisement

Employees From Other Department Announce Plan To Ramble On About Fucking Nothing Right Next To Your Desk

SEATTLE—Declaring their intention to prevent you from getting any work done whatsoever, employees from another department announced plans Friday to ramble on about fucking nothing right next to your desk. “We intend to loiter directly adjacent to where you sit and loudly discuss some stupid bullshit while you’re…

Advertisement