Vol 54 Issue 25 - America's Finest News Source | The Onion

America's Finest News Source.

America's Finest News Source.

Vol 54 Issue 25

Jun 26 2018

VideoBehind The Scene6/26/18

‘Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom’ Casting Assistant Discusses Difficulties Of Finding Extras Who Are Willing To Be Eaten Alive<em></em>

VideoBehind The Scene6/26/18

‘Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom’ Casting Assistant Discusses Difficulties Of Finding Extras Who Are Willing To Be Eaten Alive

Jun 26 2018

News in Brief6/26/18

Man Who Has Never Seen Horseshoe Crab Before Understandably Freaking The Fuck Out<em></em>

News in Brief6/26/18

Man Who Has Never Seen Horseshoe Crab Before Understandably Freaking The Fuck Out

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

Biggest Guy In Prison Tired Of Every New Inmate Beating Shit Out Of Him On Their First Day<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

Biggest Guy In Prison Tired Of Every New Inmate Beating Shit Out Of Him On Their First Day

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

Onion Employees Return To Mundane Lives Of Writing Game-Changing News Coverage Read By Billions Across Globe<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

Onion Employees Return To Mundane Lives Of Writing Game-Changing News Coverage Read By Billions Across Globe

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

25 Million Onion Social Users Run Into Glorious Flames Of Headquarters In Hopes Of Using Website One Last Time<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

25 Million Onion Social Users Run Into Glorious Flames Of Headquarters In Hopes Of Using Website One Last Time

Jun 22 2018

News In Photos6/22/18

Saudi Arabia Officially Lifts Ban On Female Monster Truck Rallies<em></em>

News In Photos6/22/18

Saudi Arabia Officially Lifts Ban On Female Monster Truck Rallies

Jun 22 2018

News In Photos6/22/18

Onion Social CEO Vaporized By Wall Of Light While Trying To Stop Algorithm From Self-Destructing<em></em>

News In Photos6/22/18

Onion Social CEO Vaporized By Wall Of Light While Trying To Stop Algorithm From Self-Destructing

Jun 22 2018

News In Photos6/22/18

Charles Krauthammer Has Ashes Spread Over Prosperous, Liberated Iraq<em></em>

News In Photos6/22/18

Charles Krauthammer Has Ashes Spread Over Prosperous, Liberated Iraq

Jun 22 2018

News In Photos6/22/18

‘Humanity Deserves To Live In Darkness,’ Onion Social Algorithm Cries Out Before Bursting Into Bright Light, Disappearing From Earthly Realm<em></em>

News In Photos6/22/18

‘Humanity Deserves To Live In Darkness,’ Onion Social Algorithm Cries Out Before Bursting Into Bright Light, Disappearing From Earthly Realm

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

Exasperated Huckabee Sanders Reminds Press Corps That Children Under 14 Can’t Feel Pain<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

Exasperated Huckabee Sanders Reminds Press Corps That Children Under 14 Can’t Feel Pain

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

Self-Destructing Onion Social Algorithm Delivers Stirring Monologue About Folly Of Mankind’s Hubris<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

Self-Destructing Onion Social Algorithm Delivers Stirring Monologue About Folly Of Mankind’s Hubris

Jun 22 2018

American Voices6/22/18

Most Americans Side With Onion Social Over Own Family, Friends <em></em>

American Voices6/22/18

Most Americans Side With Onion Social Over Own Family, Friends

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

France, India, Brazil Among Dozens Of Governments To Fall As Riots In Support Of Onion Social Increase Globally<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

France, India, Brazil Among Dozens Of Governments To Fall As Riots In Support Of Onion Social Increase Globally

Jun 22 2018

News in Brief6/22/18

Thousands Of Onion Social Users Burn Effigies Of CEO In Massive Show Of Support For Company<em></em>

News in Brief6/22/18

Thousands Of Onion Social Users Burn Effigies Of CEO In Massive Show Of Support For Company

Jun 21 2018

News in Brief6/21/18

Onion Social CEO Rebukes 480,000 Crimes At International Criminal Tribunal Including Illegal Surveillance, Insider Trading, Mass Murder, Indecent Exposure<em></em>

News in Brief6/21/18

Onion Social CEO Rebukes 480,000 Crimes At International Criminal Tribunal Including Illegal Surveillance, Insider Trading, Mass Murder, Indecent Exposure

Jun 21 2018

News in Brief6/21/18

Report: Your Father Currently Typing ‘Naked Women’ Into Yahoo Images Search Bar<em></em>

News in Brief6/21/18

Report: Your Father Currently Typing ‘Naked Women’ Into Yahoo Images Search Bar

Jun 21 2018

American Voices6/21/18

Onion Social Users Applaud Bravery Of CEO Persevering Against Falsehood, Libel<em></em>

American Voices6/21/18

Onion Social Users Applaud Bravery Of CEO Persevering Against Falsehood, Libel

Jun 21 2018

News in Brief6/21/18

Report: Make It Stop <em></em>

News in Brief6/21/18

Report: Make It Stop

Jun 21 2018

News in Brief6/21/18

Onion Social CEO Appears Before Hague Tribunal To Be Tried For Crimes Against Humanity, Promote New Website Features<em></em>

News in Brief6/21/18

Onion Social CEO Appears Before Hague Tribunal To Be Tried For Crimes Against Humanity, Promote New Website Features

Jun 21 2018

News In Photos6/21/18

Stock Market Plunges Ahead Of Onion Social Hague Trial<em></em>

News In Photos6/21/18

Stock Market Plunges Ahead Of Onion Social Hague Trial

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