Dec 5Sports News In Brief12/5/20Sports News In Brief12/5/20Stir-Crazy Nick Saban Builds Assistant Coach To Scream At In QuarantineTUSCALOOSA, AL—Desperate to find an outlet for his frustration while recovering from coronavirus, Crimson Tide head…
Dec 4News in Brief12/4/20News in Brief12/4/20Google AI Zones Out While Being Trained On Mandatory Racial Sensitivity Data SetMOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—After interrupting a machine-learning session to ask how much longer the presentation might take,…
Dec 4Sportsgraphic12/4/20Sportsgraphic12/4/20Fantasy Football Week 13: Start ’Em, Sit ’EmIt’s week 13 in the NFL, and if you are reading this it likely means you are in first place and the only person in…
Dec 4News in Brief12/4/20News in Brief12/4/20Singapore Approves First Lab-Grilled ChickenSINGAPORE—Hailing it as a major step in changing humanity’s prevailing forms of meat consumption, Singapore on…
Dec 4News in Brief12/4/20News in Brief12/4/20Obama Volunteers To Inject Vaccine, Eat Ghost Pepper, Get Bitten By Tarantula Live On New YouTube ChannelWASHINGTON—Urging Americans to “smash that sub button” if they’d like to see some real executive power, Barack Obama…
Dec 4News In Photos12/4/20News In Photos12/4/20Woman’s Hands Become Bloody Nubs Of Raw Flesh After Forgetting Nightly Moisturizing Routine
Dec 4Infographic12/4/20Infographic12/4/20Pros And Cons Of Prosecuting Trump After His PresidencyBoth state and federal prosecutors have reportedly considered filing charges against President Donald Trump for…
Dec 4News in Brief12/4/20News in Brief12/4/20CDC Introduces New Expedited Quarantine Period Of 3-5 Business Days For $29.99WASHINGTON—Revising an earlier mandate requiring Covid-19 patients to self-isolate for 14 days without exception,…
Dec 4News In Photos12/4/20News In Photos12/4/20Doctor Wondering Why There ‘Reverse’ Switch On Ventilator
Dec 4American Voices12/4/20American Voices12/4/20U.S. Narrows Scope Of Service Animals Allowed On PlanesEmotional-support animals will soon be banned on airplanes in the U.S. after the Transportation Department ruled…
Dec 3News in Brief12/3/20News in Brief12/3/20White House Dishwasher Not Sure Why Trump Keeps Offering Him PardonWASHINGTON—Shrugging as he tried to explain the motivation behind the commander in chief’s frequent overtures, White…
Dec 3Sports News In Brief12/3/20Sports News In Brief12/3/20Rob Gronkowski Thrilled After Purchasing Rare, Game-Worn Rob Gronkowski JerseyTAMPA, FL—Expressing disbelief over finally winning the prized piece of memorabilia at auction, Buccaneers tight end…
Dec 3American Voices12/3/20American Voices12/3/20Dictionary.com Names ‘Pandemic’ Word Of The YearDictionary.com has named “pandemic” its word of the year for 2020, noting that the site also saw an increase in…
Dec 3News in Brief12/3/20News in Brief12/3/20Jimmy Carter On Covid Vaccine: ‘There’s No Way In Hell I’m Letting Them Put That Thing In Me’PLAINS, GA—Following reports that the Covid-19 vaccine would soon be available, 39th President Jimmy Carter…
Dec 3News in Brief12/3/20News in Brief12/3/20Exhausted Researchers Inform Public Covid Vaccine Won’t Shrink You Down To Size Of AntATLANTA—Begging Americans to just use some common sense, exhausted CDC researchers assured the public Thursday that…
Dec 3News in Brief12/3/20News in Brief12/3/20Food Critic Has Late Night Hankering For Liquid Nitrogen-Frozen Raviolo BalloonLONDON—Exhausted after another long day tasting the latest innovations of the culinary world, food critic Norman…
Dec 3News in Brief12/3/20News in Brief12/3/20William Barr Celebrates Holidays By Giving Lethal Injections To Those Less FortunateWASHINGTON—Grinning cheerfully as he did his best to spread the spirit of the season, Attorney General William Barr…