Taylor Swift Now Dating Senator Joseph McCarthy

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APPLETON, WI—Weeks after stepping out in London with musician Tom Odell, sources confirmed that country crooner Taylor Swift has split with the British heartthrob and is now dating U.S. senator Joseph R. McCarthy (R-WI). “Taylor and Tail Gunner Joe were seen canoodling at a diner in his hometown of Appleton, and we can confirm that the two are officially an item,” Popsugar.com blogger Michelle Lee said of the blossoming romance between the 23-year-old pop star and the fiery anti-communist crusader, nicknaming the couple “McSwift.” “Taylor really admires Joe’s patriotism and loves the way he’s so committed to his causes. He’s just an unpretentious Midwestern guy from Wisconsin, and that’s exactly what she needs right now.” At press time, sources reported that Taylor and McCarthy had been spotted cozying up in the back of a hearing at the State Department.