The Life Of Diana, Princess Of Wales

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Today marks 20 years since the funeral of Princess Diana, known to many as the “people’s princess.” The Onion looks back at the life of Princess Diana before it was cut tragically short.


July 1, 1961

Diana Frances Spencer is born into an average aristocratic family and grows up dreaming of one day marrying a handsome distant cousin

August 2, 1979

Diana becomes smitten with Prince Charles after watching him ably plunge the African nation of Rhodesia into post-colonial civil war

February 3, 1981

An ecstatic Diana wins BBC Radio 1’s Marry A Prince phone-in contest

July 29, 1981

Diana weds Prince Charles, inspiring wealthy women across the globe to believe that they too could someday become even wealthier


June 21, 1982

Diana gives birth to Prince William, who is third in line for dragging this whole thing out


Sept 15, 1984

Diana gives birth to her hottest son

November 20, 1995

Diana confesses that she cheated on Charles with the people of the British Empire, whom she adores


July 1996

Like everyone else that summer, Diana is swept up by the “Macarena” dance craze

August 28, 1996

Diana and Charles divorce, further fueling rumors that the royal relationship is on the rocks


January 7, 1997

Turning her attention to humanitarian work, Diana clears a 10-acre minefield in war-torn Uganda


August 31, 1997

British tabloids publish a scandalous exposé alleging that Diana has been killed in a car crash



The spirit of Princess Diana lives on in thousands of now worthless Beanie Babies around the world