Stuck last minute trying to figure out a gift for the father who has everything he possibly needs? Well, these unique gift ideas will let your dad know you’ve been thinking about him.
Homemade coupon for 14-hour back rub
Portal to 1981, the last year he was happy
Just a giant 80-pound sack of beef, power tools, and Dire Straits albums ($59.99)
Not quite sure what dad wants this year? Well, this gargantuan sack of grade-A beef, power tools, and albums from the seminal British rock band will have you covered. Soak the bag with a few cans of Miller Lite for a bonus treat!
2013 Chrysler 300 ($45,000)
Piece of printer paper with ‘Dad’ written on it ($4)
‘A Few Good Men’ novelty bottle opener
Perfect for when your dad just wants to unwind, this bottle opener will, every time he cracks open a beer, play the full four-minute-long audio of the scene in which Capt. Ross (Kevin Bacon) and Lt. Kaffee (Tom Cruise) question Cpl. Barnes (Jack Nicholson) about “Code Reds.”
Just a nice picture of all you kids
Small bottle of dirt you can say is from Tiger Stadium or Gettysburg or wherever ($7.99)
Tiny, nondescript bottle of dirt you can make your dad believe was collected from Tiger Stadium before it was demolished, or from the fields of Gettysburg, the shores of Normandy, the old Yankee stadium, or, you know, wherever.