Unpacking The BowlAn editorial series on marijuana legalization.  

What Happens To Your Body When You Smoke

Step 1: Blood cells smuggle THC past immune system by stuffing it into their cytoplasm and acting natural

Step 2: Rapidly increased heartbeat sends signals to the brain to anticipate any signs of approaching police

Step 3: Third eye opens

Step 4: Drug takes little extra jaunt through the arms

Step 5: Marijuana leaves overlay your vision in a kaleidoscopic pattern

Step 6: Relaxing, tingling sensation washes over your entire body, relieving anxiety and temporarily eliminating any knowledge that you work at Jo-Ann Fabric for $11 an hour

Step 7: Body desperately issues silent cry for help by making eyes bloodshot


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The Anatomy Of A Cannabis Plant

1 Pistil: Highly poisonous part of the plant that suffocates smoker in seconds if not properly removed before use.

2 Cola: Tightly clustered buds that have vowed to always stick together no matter what and to never abandon one another.

3 Leaves: These are the marijuana plant’s hands

4 Tiny security camera: This microscopic, 3.1-megapixel camera contains state-of-the-art facial recognition technology and sends a constant stream of HD photos, as well as a GPS signal, to the police.

5 Stalk: Useless part of the plant that can only be used to make fabric, rope, oil, and paper.

6 Monsanto Copyright: This plant is a registered trademark of the Monsanto Company.

7 Roots: Perform the crucial role of connecting the plant directly to the depths of Hell where marijuana receives its nutrients.


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