Things You Should Never Say To A Flight Attendant

The time to work through your apprehensions about flying machines was before you got on board.

Before bugging your flight attendant, try politely asking the person currently sitting next to your co-conspirator if they wouldn’t mind swapping since they’ll be dead in 30 minutes anyway.

Listen man, it’s one SkyMall per person. Be more purposeful with your copy next time.

You’re talking to a flight attendant, not a firefighter. Don’t bother them with stuff like this.

Unfortunately it’s unlikely that they will be able to hear you if this is the case.

Don’t be an asshole.

The appropriate way to do this is to visibly and audibly struggle while looking around frustratedly.

Flight attendants don’t get a heads-up from air traffic control on which planes will disappear en route.

Just politely nod and smile and say “You did it!”

That’s what you said yesterday, and you got there fine.

Flight attendants aren’t medically trained so you should always wait to land first before experiencing any cardiac emergencies.

It’s pretty rude to show how little attention you paid to the safety demonstration.

Coward.

You need to listen to the safety instructions during takeoff because you will know that once the plane is comfortable in-flight and the seatbelt sign is off, the cockpit is free to take over.

There are some seat changes that a flight attendant can arrange, but this isn’t one of them.

Savvy travelers avoid this common flight faux-pas.

Please keep your rivalries on the ground and don’t disrupt the flight.

Sorry, but this is only available to passengers flying business class.

Nothing’s more irritating than when a passenger holds up the plane for hours or even days because they’re waiting for The Almighty’s blessing to proceed to Denver.

No one likes to hear they slipped up when doing their job.