- Any distortion of facts, quotes, or context within an article should always be clearly labeled.
- As a journalist, it’s your responsibility to recuse yourself from reporting on any crimes that you have personally aided or abetted.
- Tip the parking attendant in advance if you plan on spending more than 30 minutes smoking cigarettes in a shadowy corner of their garage.
- Remember that the success of an article is not measured in pageviews, but rather its click-through rate via social media platforms and overall SEO integration.
- Never stray from your publication’s code of ethics, or you risk losing the trust of the dozens of Americans who still depend on traditional media.
More from The Onion