WASHINGTON—In an effort to dare pry where the mainstream media would not, Tucker Carlson announced Thursday that he would be putting his life on the line by getting a booster shot for a Fox News investigation into the Covid-19 vaccine. “God only knows what will happen to me when I take this shot, which is why I’ve selflessly volunteered to become one of the first to receive it,” said Carlson, who informed Tucker Carlson Tonight viewers that they would be the first to know if he were injured or even killed in his attempt to secure his third dose of the Pfizer vaccine, gravely explaining that he was conducting tireless research into booking a booster shot appointment for as soon as possible before he lost his nerve. “Remember, if you hear about a clinic or pharmacy offering Covid-19 booster shots, do not take it; instead, call the show, and I’ll be there to ask the tough questions like, ‘Am I eligible?’ and ‘May I have it?’” At press time, Carlson was calling for an investigation into the nurse at his physician’s office who told him he still needed to wait a few more weeks for the CDC’s clearance just like everybody else.