U.S. Still Enjoying Small But Loyal Following

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WASHINGTON—While the nation’s mainstream popularity has largely diminished in recent years, sources confirmed this week that the United States still retains a passionate fan base composed of a few extremely dedicated followers. “America does not enjoy the same kind of relevance or widespread acclaim it used to, but there are still a few holdout devotees who closely follow whatever the country does,” sociologist Sophie Kellerman said, adding that those individuals “who are still into America are really into America.” “There isn’t a whole lot of international appeal anymore, and many former enthusiasts have been disappointed by the country’s more recent choices and overall direction. However, there’s a certain niche group that seems to remain die-hard fans no matter what.” Kellerman added that while it’s too late for the United States to go out on top, it could still salvage some of its former glory and end its run on a high note.