The United States has discovered nearly $1 trillion in mineral deposits, including copper, iron, and lithium, in Afghanistan. What do you think?

"This is fabulous news! Are we going to distribute it to all Americans equally?"
Lynda Marvin • Jailer

"And let's not forget that Iraq sits atop a nearly equivalent amount of U.S. debt."
Gerry Jurewicz • Systems Analyst
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"In your face, Soviet Union!"
Adrian Wilson • Precision Grinder