Venomous Sharks Found In Once ‘Biologically Dead’ Thames River

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A new report has revealed that the Thames river, which was previously declared “biologically dead,” has recovered enough to host over 115 species of fish, including venomous sharks called Spurdogs. What do you think?

“Now that it’s healing, nature is clearly looking for revenge.”

Jeff Buchholz, Space Filler

“Hopefully this means people will soon be able to live in London again, too.”

Suzanne Zofi, Photo Album Curator

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“If we killed the river once, I’m confident we can kill it again.”

Ivan DeLessio, Assistant Middleman