YONKERS, NY—Expressing frustration that the popular reality TV series was being preempted to deliver such a humdrum message, viewers of ABC’s The Bachelorette were reportedly annoyed Monday after the episode was interrupted just to announce the person who will set back social progress 40 years. “It’s so obnoxious to have to wait an extra 20 minutes to find out who’s going to get the final four roses just so we can hear some news anchor drone on about the man or woman who will restrict reproductive and LGBTQ rights for decades to come,” said viewer Marsha Calkins, 31, echoing the sentiments of millions of Americans who were vexed at having to hear about the nominee who would irretrievably alter the ideological bent of the nation’s final arbiter of justice during such a pivotal late-season episode. “The hometown dates are right around the corner, meaning what happens tonight has significant repercussions for the rest of the season, and I don’t appreciate having to put it all on pause for the whole song and dance about someone who will protect partisan gerrymandering, gut unions, and consolidate conservative power for the remainder of our lifetimes. The fate of Becca’s entire love life could rest on what happens during this trip to the Bahamas!” Calkins expressed hope that this situation could be avoided in the future by Ruth Bader-Ginsburg announcing her retirement well ahead of the Bachelor In Paradise finale in mid-September.
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