The Onion
The A.V. Club
Deadspin
Gizmodo
Jalopnik
Jezebel
Kotaku
Lifehacker
The Root
The Takeout
The Inventory

America's Finest News Source.

Home Latest Politics Sports Local Entertainment The Topical Opinion OGN Shop

America's Finest News Source.

Home Latest Politics Sports Local Entertainment The Topical Opinion OGN Shop

What Did We Find In Our Winter Coat Pockets?

You may also like

Trump Announces Plan To Retrain Nation’s 3 Million Unemployed Americans As Human Ventilators

Tom Brady Awakens From Week-Long Kombucha Bender To Discover He’s A Tampa Bay Buccaneer

Woman Tries To Spark Casual Chat In Long Grocery Store Line As If She Not Desperately Attempting To Outrun Death

Trump Announces Plan To Retrain Nation’s 3 Million Unemployed Americans As Human Ventilators

Trump Announces Plan To Retrain Nation’s 3 Million Unemployed Americans As Human Ventilators

Yesterday 3:44PM

Tom Brady Awakens From Week-Long Kombucha Bender To Discover He’s A Tampa Bay Buccaneer

Tom Brady Awakens From Week-Long Kombucha Bender To Discover He’s A Tampa Bay Buccaneer

Thursday 9:30AM

Woman Tries To Spark Casual Chat In Long Grocery Store Line As If She Not Desperately Attempting To Outrun Death

Woman Tries To Spark Casual Chat In Long Grocery Store Line As If She Not Desperately Attempting To Outrun Death

More from G/O Media

Read on

Man Reflects On Cyclical Nature Of Existence After Learning McDonald’s Has Stopped Offering All-Day Breakfast Once Again

Read on

Thousands Of Formerly Endangered White Rhinos Flood City Streets Mere Days After Humans Quarantined Indoors

Read on

Deal Alert: The Federal Government Is Cutting You A $1,200 Stimulus Check That You Can, And Should, Spend Exclusively On 75 Copies Of ‘Stardew Valley’

Read on

Study Finds Female Mammals Live Longer Than Males

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Now you can get the top stories from The Onion delivered to your inbox.

1/06/12 11:15AM

•

SEE MORE: Opinion

Opinion Statshot Vol 48 Issue 01

Illustration for article titled What Did We Find In Our Winter Coat Pockets?

Share This Story

Get our newsletter

More from The Onion

10 Photos Of Plus-Size Models We Deserve A Pat On The Back For Running

How The 1% Are Responding To Coronavirus

U.S. Economy Grinds To Halt As Nation Realizes Money Just A Symbolic, Mutually Shared Illusion

Idaho Governor Orders State’s Restaurant To Be Shut Down