What To Expect In The Second Democratic Debates

Illustration for article titled What To Expect In The Second Democratic Debates

The second round of the Democratic Party 2020 primary debates will feature the top 20 presidential candidates over two nights in Detroit. The Onion takes a look at what viewers should be watching for in the second Democratic debates.


Bernie Sanders stuttering response after briefly forgetting who economy rigged against.

More intimate feel with one large family-style podium.

Marianne Williamson following up previous debate by absolutely tearing New Zealand a new one.

Generally joyless affair without affable, energizing presence of Eric Swalwell.

$3.50 Miller Lites and $1 hot dogs.

Several excruciating moments of Joe Biden gathering himself.

CNN scheduling error on second night leading to Steve Bullock being only candidate onstage.


The same hundred words Andrew Yang memorized for the first debate.

Julián Castro demanding to know what the fuck happened to all his buzz.

Overall, probably less entertaining and informative than whatever TBS plans on showing.