What To Say If You Catch Your Partner Watching Pornography

A child only turns 5 once, you know.

Truth hurts.

They repeatedly told you that you were the only horny MILF in their barely legal eyes. Are you not enough?

Porn perpetuates toxic, unattainable standards for how naked people really are when they have sex.

You two could have saved a lot of money if you hadn’t been paying for separate accounts this entire time.

Be honest about your feelings, perhaps before chasing him around the apartment and banging him on the head with a rolling pin.

A gentle reminder never hurts.

You’ve heard of the sex before, but this is your first time seeing it.

This will distract from the fact that the other person in the video is you.

It looks terrible.

You spent over $100 on those DVDs, and it’s pretty messed up he’s choosing PornHub over your thoughtfully selected present.

While he’s staring at you in horror clutching his genitals, it’s good to clarify exactly how all of this works.

Do you really want to continue dating someone who is into such derivative sex acts?

Where did he even get this depraved tome? No respectable bookseller north of the Thames would stock Lady Chatterley’s Lover.

You can learn a lot about your partner based on their decision to stop or continue.

Totally cool if they’re watching porn for work. Otherwise, though, it’s betrayal.

Just in case they’re too shy to ask.

Their orgasm can wait until after a few rounds of Battle Royale.

Some may think of pornography as harmless fun, but the law is the law.

Were they going to sit there and watch it again with you and pretend to be surprised?

Clearly articulating your personal boundaries is essential for a healthy relationship.

Though catching your partner watching porn can be uncomfortable, it can also be a learning experience.

It’s okay to ask questions if you’re struggling to follow the plot.

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