PLEASANTVILLE, NY—Expressing consternation that law enforcement officials remained oblivious to his insinuations, New York Times puzzle editor Will Shortz expressed frustration Tuesday that police had yet to crack the patterns of hints and droll clues in his taunting crossword puzzles which reveal the locations of 40 years’ worth of murder victims. “I naturally assumed that, at some point during the last four decades, at least one detective would be smart enough to solve the case,” said Shortz, who also implied that the geographic coordinates of the victims could be determined by analyzing the sudoku puzzles in the Sunday edition. “These puzzles lead to an entire graveyard of bodies for anyone clever enough to find them. If they could only determine the significance of each week’s master clue—this week it’s a four-letter word for ‘seabird’—they would have the key to my scheme and have taken the first step to putting me behind bars. They already have all the clues they need. Lyndon B. Johnson’s biographer, seven across? Clearly a reference to a homeless man I suffocated with a plastic bag in South Carolina. I mean, it’s right there.” Shortz has resolved to publish the names of his victims alongside the answer sheet to this week’s crossword puzzles.
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