MOUNT STERLING, KY—Saying she appeared to have purchased her ticket solely for the self-contained chemical toilets, witnesses told reporters Wednesday that Cavalcade Folk and Roots Festival attendee Angelica Brichford, who was spotted beelining it for the porta potties, must have come specifically to see them. “The second the gates opened and the crowd poured in, she just sprinted off toward the porta potties, so I can only assume she’s a huge fan,” said festivalgoer Todd Vogel, who explained that Brichford got right up to the front at the porta potties, after not even pausing to listen to any of the acts on the stages she passed along the way. “To be honest, I didn’t even see the porta potties on the event poster. Don’t get me wrong—I’m glad they’re here, and I’ll probably check them out later on. But this woman was apparently very anxious to make it over to the porta potties as soon as possible.” Reached for comment, Brichford expressed disappointment, telling reporters the porta potties used to be way better back in the day.