
DAYTON, OH—Appearing oblivious to the fact that her friends were shifting uncomfortably in their seats as she spoke, local woman Annie McClellan shared an anecdote about her boyfriend getting annoyed that was undercut by widespread knowledge of the man’s anger issues, sources confirmed Tuesday. “You should have seen David’s face when he realized the takeout place got his wing flavor wrong—he actually made me turn the car around!” said McClellan, laughing as she told the story to her friends, who, having reportedly witnessed the 35-year-old man’s infamous meltdowns numerous times, exchanged nervous, wide-eyed glances across the table as they imagined what could only have been an explosion of rage. “He was practically howling and tearing the bag in two, and he even went on this silly tirade about how lemon pepper and lemon garlic weren’t the same thing. Man, I should have gotten a video. You know how he can be funny that way, when he gets a little disappointed.” At press time, McClellan incorrectly stated that her friends were not going to believe the part about how her boyfriend curled up on the floor and screamed when they finally got home and realized the restaurant hadn’t given them any ranch dipping sauce.