MINNEAPOLIS—Realizing she had yet to make it out to a protest, local woman Alexis Hunt reportedly expressed hope Tuesday that police brutality would still be going on next week, too. “I feel bad I haven’t gotten around to protesting yet, but there’s still the chance cops will be beating people in the street this coming week, too—fingers crossed!” said Hunt, who pointed to warmer weather and restaurant reopenings as reasons she’d been “totally booked” these past two weeks. “I’ve been checking social media to see if there’s anything planned, and I found a video of a cop roughing up a couple of black teenagers, so that’s encouraging. I would just hate for things to end before the sign I ordered off Etsy arrived. I’d be down for something on the weekend. Maybe, like, 1:30, 2 p.m? And close to my house since I hate walking.” At press time, a disappointed Hunt was worried she’d run out of time upon learning her city was moving toward disbanding the police force.
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