Queso Dip: Stupid tortilla chip broke and fell straight down onto our chest.
Spicy Mustard: Didn’t discover it until it had dried. Walked around like a goddamn idiot all afternoon.
Mayonnaise: Thank fucking God this blended in okay, because we were not going home to change.
Marinara Sauce: Ugh, this was fucking awful. Rubbing at it only made it worse.
Soy Sauce: God, right down the middle of our shirt. Just fucking great.
Cocktail Sauce: Couldn’t even get it out, so it completely ruined our shirt. That was a good shirt, too. Goddammit!
Something Reddish?: Not even sure what this was, but when we took our shirt off at the end of the day, there it fucking was.
Marinara Sauce Again: For fuck’s sake!
Slice Of Sausage-And-Pepper Pizza: The whole damn hunk of cheese slid off the slice onto our shirt. God, we’re stupid.
Prosecco: Actually, this dried, and it didn’t look terrible.
Toothpaste: The fucking intern pointed it out in the middle of the sales meeting.
Water: Sure, it came out no problem, but we don’t think we need to tell you that sitting through half of Zootopia with half a sopping-wet shirt really sucks.
Mom’s Ashes: Unbelievable.