I like to keep my ears to the ground when it comes to office supply and organization chatter, so I know the buzz around our new hanging file folders has reached a fever pitch. In fact, I’ve been in the hanging file folder game for over 30 years, and I’ve never seen anything that even approaches the hype these bad boys have been receiving. But it’s nothing compared to getting your hands on them for yourself.
These new hanging file folders are gonna knock you on your ass.
I don’t have to tell you how much speculation there’s been about these things—you’ve been hearing it yourself for months. “Are they gonna have multiple colors? Are they gonna have tabs? What about oversize hanging file folders?” All your questions will soon be answered. But you’re gonna have to buy them yourself to find out.
At this point, I’ve lost count of how many people have stopped me on the street and asked me straight up, “Dan. How can these new hanging file folders possibly live up to all the hype?” And up until now, all I’ve been able to say is, “Just wait and see.” Well, the wait is almost over, folks. And I promise, when you open these hanging file folders and fill them with receipts, or warranties, or whatever loose paperwork you need organized, they are going to live up to the hype and then some. They’re gonna blow your loftiest expectations out of the water.
You’ve seen all the commercials. You’ve heard all the radio ads. But guess what: None of them do these hanging file folders justice. Not even freaking close.
The hanging file folder industry is never gonna be the same after this. By the time our competitors realize what hit them, it’ll already be too late. But trust me, you want to get in on this early, because these things are gonna fly off the shelves. Remember last year, when you hemmed and hawed about buying some new hanging file folders but you never did? Didn’t you feel like a jerk?
Or maybe you’re happy with your little system of manila folders and old envelopes. Maybe that’s enough for your filing needs. If so, you’re a better man than I. But for the rest of you, the discerning consumers who’ve been champing at the bit, waiting for a hanging file folder that would change the way you look at hanging file folders forever: They’re here. They’re finally here.
Come and get ’em.
No more tempting you from the pages of your Sunday circular; no more endless speculation. The hanging file folders have arrived, better than your wildest dreams. But until you get them for yourself—touch them, feel their weight, hang them on the rails of your own personal filing cabinet—you’ll never know how amazing these new hanging file folders really are.
The talk is over. It’s time to organize your documents.
One quick thing, though: Contrary to what everyone’s been saying, we don’t actually have multicolor tabs right now. Just yellow.